If you have anxiety, feel sad or out of control, read this.

Hi everybody! I hope you are all having a wonderful August 1st... I cannot believe that it is already August! Time/summer flies by so fast! I'm actually feeling kind of bad because I thought I would be blogging/having the urge to blog a lot more than I actually am. I thought to myself: "it's summer, I'll have plenty of time, I'll have so much to write about, blah blah blah". I do have plenty of things to write about. Every time a cute new boutique has opened up this summer I've ventured in with my mom and have taken cute photos and have reviews planned for up here. I have makeup waiting to be reviewed, exercise tips to share with you all as well as weekly updates... but for some reason, the thought of even taking the time to blog is stressing me out.

You see, throughout my life whenever something is thrown at me, whether it is a paper, homework or reading assignment at school, a new magazine or even a tube of lip gloss, I HAVE to get it done/HAVE to read it/HAVE to use it up right away. I always just feel so much better when something is done. I don't know if this is irrational or not. I have no idea if it is a way for me to have some control over things or not (most likely is). Every since my father passed away when I was a freshman in high school, having control over certain things is what keeps me calm. While I know that I'm announcing to basically the entire internet that yes, my father has passed away, but yes... I can talk about it and am actually very open about it when I feel that the time is right. When a circumstance happens in your life like that that is so beyond your control that you cannot possibly wrap your head around it, any situation in life that you can dictate or have some form of control over feels good. ORRR this could all just be my type A personality trait of needing to get things done.

Regardless, I have been a little anxious/worried lately about a lot of things in life. While I wish I could be this cool, calm, and collected person who has my life together all of the time, LOL because I'm not and won't ever be. Especially if I'm going to continue with this blog, I want to whoever is reading this to know (no matter big or small the amount of people) that I am NOT perfect. If any of you go on my Instagram and think that each and every one of those photos accurately represent how my life is currently going 100%, then all of you are sadly (or not) mistaken. Heck, even Instagram itself sometimes stresses me out.

Right now is a crazy time because my last year of college is quickly approaching. The thought of this is absolutely insane for me and for some of my friends. The routine of school is something that we have all been used to since such young ages, and the thought of that routine of class, friends, gym, sorority (structure, routine, structure, routine!) suddenly ending makes me full of anxiety. I have no idea what I'm going to do when I'm thrown out into the real world. I'm envious of my boyfriend and best friend from home, who both have basically guaranteed job offers from internships. They will find out if they will have a job for after graduation before even the first week of school. I am so beyond happy for them but I also wish I could have that type of certainty to put my mind at ease. However, there is a time and a place for everything, and I have to tell myself that I will find a job after graduation, just like them.

But because of this worry, I have been trying to work on my resume all summer and have even started some cover letters for potential companies I might want to work for. COVER LETTERS! I guess it might be a *good* thing that I'm starting this early, but at the same point, I need to tell myself to majorly chill.

I'm a little nervous about living in my sorority house. I am so excited to have the wonderful opportunity to live in during my last year of college, but at the same point, I had an apartment last year with a bedroom to myself, so I know the adjustment will be a little strange again. I know it will be worth it though to live with 48 of my sisters/best friends and that I have a once in a lifetime opportunity. All of my worries in regards to that are in the unknown, and even though it may be a little louder than having an apartment bedroom to myself, these girls will be there for me no matter what, as I always will for them. I am looking forward to many fun nights ahead.

To top off today's anxieties, I ordered my books a few months ago so I would just have them early for school, and the company that I ordered my books from sent me an email today saying my books were DUE in fourteen days! What?! Along with all of the other worries I have had, seeing that email was the straw that broke the camel's back. This was literally me:

Since I love Ashley I. from The Bachelor so much as well as her reactions, I'm going to list each thing that has been stressing me out with a funny Ashley I. face.

Stress #1:Thinking about post-grad job/life

Stress #2: MONEY!!

Stress #3: The fact that my professors have already been sending me emails about READING

Stress #4: Stress eating 

My point is, life can be filled with so many unknowns. It can get rough sometimes. But what I've learned and need to continue telling myself is that chances are if you are feeling this way, there is someone out there feeling exactly the same. There are always going to be stressors, but life is also full of so may wonderful things to look forward to. Having a strong network of people to lift you up is always important. That and Ashley I. Bachelor photos. 

And let's be real, it could be worse...

You could be discussing onions on national TV. 

XO, 

  Grace Elle

P.S. if any of you are feeling stressed or sad and need someone to talk to, I am always here! :)